Im sad again

For all the times you stayed up,
When my tummy was upset
And all the nights you made up
Stories, because i wasnt sleep yet
For all the things you gave up
To make sure my needs were met

Mami
this little girl you raised up
Will never, ever your love forget..

Suddenly miss home very much.. getting tired with nasi goreng nasi goreng nasi goreng everyday.. i need good and healthy food.. i want delicious food.. mami's homemade food..

im getting tired too.. quarreled with someone.. not quarrel but just.. didnt contact anymore.. because of some stupid reason.. again.... i wana go home.. im tired.. The best place to be when you are sad is in mami's lap.. i miss home very much..

now everyone is in kuching now.. most of my friends.. i felt lonely.. they will balik kampung soon.. and during christmas.. what should i do and where should i go during christmas?? i dunno... i miss the time when we sang christmas song together with popo and the rest last year.. i miss the time when i watched fireworks with family at The Spring last year during christmas.. i miss the time when dadi hugged me and say i love u on new year when we countdown together at airport.. miss miss miss miss... :(

im seriously praying that i can have my annual leave on cny so that i can go back and celebrate in kch.. people keep asking me when am i going back.. saying that im going back during cny is just comforting myself.. im not sure.. really unsure.. popo called me and said if i didnt go back during cny she will cry.. owh come on... :(

I love and miss everyone very much now.. seriously... T_T

haih

Yesterday was the second time i saw doctor do dressing for brain cancer uncle..He called me and my friend to go with him and help him so we just went in with him.. without knowing what procedure he is going to do.. when i enter the uncle's room, i saw staff nurses had prepared many equipments and waiting 4 doctor already.. when i see the equipments, i was like.. gosh.. what is he gonna do?? cz there were lots and lots of equipments like forceps, blade, scissors and many more..i was kinda scared.. and felt sorry for the uncle neh.. TT

So the doctor just instruct us to support the uncle's shoulder and hip.. at first he injected dunno wad into his big big big pressure ulcer wound.. the uncle keep on struggling..T_T the only thing i can do is sayang his hand.. i dunno wad can i do for him.. he is very kesian.. and i asked him to tahan for a while.. he can listen to me.. he answered "okayyy"..with deep and low voice.. awww i was going to cry man.. i never knew that he can talk.. then doctor started to cut his dead skin using forceps and blade.. the uncle just lay quietly for him to cut..i was wondering what is he thinking.. sure he felt very painful but he cannot do anything.. =(

i'll pray for u uncle.. dont worry u will be ok.. :(

posting~

After 2 weeks of posting in hospital, i get to learn many things.. iv learnt that.. life is sooo fragile.. there are many cases that ive never expected in my entire life before.. we always read in newspaper that road accidents or perompakan happened everywhere.. and we never treat it seriously.. just treat those news as lame and boring.. but once u see the real patient.. u will think that this isnt small case.. haih..

i have one patient suffering from brain cancer.. its the final stage already and he is 50 years old only.. thats cruel... he just stay on the bed and cant move at all till he developed stage 4 pressure sore..the wound is very very big n deep til i can see the sacrum with my own eyes.. TT and his trochanter area also develop stage 3 pressure sore.. gosh... when doctor helped him do dressing, he uses the blade to cut the dead skin.. its so.... :( its soo painful till the semi conscious uncle shouted out loud ah.. haih heart break... and fyi.. pressure sore is something horrible horrible horrible..i wana vomit once i see it.. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bedsore
click if u wana know more or curious or *have the guts to see*..

And ya..a 21 years old lady has tumour in her brain too.. my goodness can u imagine? thats the time when we are heading towards our future and capture our dreams.. and thats the time when we enjoy our life too.. heard from my friend that she is bald and without eyebrow lo.. soo cruel huh.. T.T

Then there is one patient.. road accident.. omg i can see his tendon when doctor was doing dressing for him.. his skin is teared and half of it is gone.. i repeat.. GONE... like there is one big hole there.. the blood keep flowing and i thought im ok with it.. i just stand there and look at it.. but after a long time, i feel like vomiting and became pitam.. i can see bright light and i felt very hot.. so i quickly go out of the room.. so as my friend.. i think its because of the smell..makes us very uncomfortable.. then the second time i can see that his wound is healing..*of cz..this time i can tahan till the end lo hee* doctor told me that it takes about one month for the mitosis process.. heehee..after that the patient will undergo an operation which is to tampal skin from his other parts of body to his leg.. which will take a long long time too.. haih.. i wonder.. how about the fee ho? T.T

And a past footballer is paralyze..i heard from staff nurse that its something to do with his spinal cord..its so sudden for him and he keeps blaming the god and asking why the God wana curse him like this.. he is very depressed too.. and i saw doctor insert catheter into his penis.. gosh! can u imagine? insert a tube into a small hole.. aih aih.. apa nak jadi ni...

when i choose nursing everyone will be telling me that being a nurse needs to help people to clean faeces and urine.. yeah thats true.. i cleaned it and helped them to put pampers almost everyday.. diff kinds of faeces.. watery, hard, blackish, greenish, yellowish.. diff odours too.. but thats not the end of the world la hehe.. i still can tahan.. dont forget there is something called mask ma.. and something called gloves.. and theres something called double protection.. we wore 2 masks, 2 gloves and apron when we wana do this procedure.. so exaggerate and funny ah..as if we are attending H1N1 patient...hee but its for our own good ma.. who cares.. Xp

in short, so far i still love nursing and i believe it will increase more and more as time goes by.. its soo challenging as u will never know who and what kinda patients and injuries you will be facing everyday..they said we will know whether we really love nursing onot when we are in sem 3.. waiting for that time to come then! oh ya im going to sem 2 lo.. *cheers* hee

after a long long time... ^^

Its me again!hee..
I went to church with my sis on last sunday and she actually prayed for me that i will control myself from sitting in front of my lappy too long and neglected my studies.. she told God i bought p1 wimax eh.. cool~ hee dont worry i will control myself la..cz exam is coming soon.. my final exam.. aih time flies.. in just a nick of time summative exam is near and i haven't started my revision yet.. let me see.. gosh 25 more days to go.. aarh~

oh well i went to indah water, which is a sewerage company.. a company for sewerage treatment.. the weather was sooooooo damn hot ah... T.T we keep on sweating like hell and need to smell bau tahi and bau longkang again.. but its more to bau longkang la.. i cant really smell tahi.. XD

The funny thing is.. many villagers menceroboh that place and treat it as recreation centre.. the penasihat showed us many pics and they really brought many things for picnic at that place.. zzz not smelly kah?? just because there's a big pond there doesnt mean its recreation centre la... waliu..inside the pond is full of shit man... some even went there for fishing.. and kids gather there to find cacing..@_@ and play around.. but unfortunately.. there are a lot of cases where they fell into the pond and died.. because the sludge just like quicksand and pull them inside.. He said when they fell down into the pond, they will start to shout TAHI TAHI!! then start to dance shuffle inside and he really danced in front of us..
*p/s he is quite old...* heehee i really laugh till very long ah! soo funny kia..hihik! it was quite fun when compared to sitting in class whole day la..At least we have the chance to visit and expose to HUGE amount of shit ma.. XD i enjoyed it..^^

We start to study Malaysian studies or PA lo.. T.T sooooo boring ah.. but the good thing is.. out tutor always ask us to read by ourselves.. so i dont have to listen to him to read and read and read.... zzz he just tell us the stories and obviously..no one is listening...i just look at those who sleeps in class..and laugh with my friend.. hihik.. their sleeping patterns all same ah.. the heads slowly become lower and lower and lower.. then when the head really *doom* drop down.. they will start to look around and pretending that they are stil conscious.. lolx so naughty..

you may be wondering why am i not sleeping..its simply because i drink coffee everyday... T.T i dont wana get addicted! but i just cant help it.. if i didnt drink coffee.. the whole day i will be sleeping in class man.. especially during psychology.. HELP ME!plus tutor always like to ask me questions.. always benadryl benadryl.. owh i wana langgar dinding liao.. =X stress.. =(

today is tuesday and i cant wait to go to church with my sis again.. its soo good to see her there.. but i dunno why.. everytime when they asked us to pray for each other.. i will cry when i pray for my sis.. i can smile and laugh for the first minute.. then second minute i was crying already..i guess the holy spirit is all around us that makes me so emo eh.. hihik.. but honestly.. who wouldn't cry oh if her sis is leaving to america soon? whenever i prayed for her that she will take good care of herself and stay connected to everyone of us when she is in america.. my tears will start to drop already..who can accompany me to go to church by that time? who will talk to me and give me many many things when we meet? who will laugh with me and sing with me in church that time? =X i know the rest can do those things.. but i just feel comfortable only when im with her in the church.. haih..

i really gonna miss you ah ying.. tho i may seemed cold to u and always him u.. but i really was playing with u nia la.. i really feel glad to see u every week.. you are the only closest one with me in kl..hell no i will hate u la... haih.. =X

okie done.. i've vomited out everything liao.. hihik! comfortable.. will write more next time..goodnight!

To whom it may concerned

hey.. don't bully my friend la.. u are very cheap u know.. do such stupid things..zzz

Terasa kah? if terasa then u will know im actually talking about u.. please behave well and be civilized a bit.. dont act like cave man that does everything without thinking of the consequences.. as you grow older you will feel ashamed of what you did now.. so please.. stop! zzz

TO DORIS!

DORIS YII TIEN TIEN!

ah tian... why u x put my pic on ur big big pic? why u put u n loke chin nia!

i also wan!!

i also wan!!

hihik!

i miss ya my friends! muacks

blah~

mami...

i hate to wash my clothes.....
i really dunno how to wash..
i spend half day "ku" in my toilet to wash my clothes u noe...
wash till backache..
now then i noe how izit feels like to do this everyday like wad u did always..

i also feel sick of the hairs on our floor...
the broom that we bought always stick to our hairs when we tried to sweep it...
the more we sweep, the more the hair on our floor..
so amount of hair is directly proportional to rate of sweeping..XD stupid..

like wad u said mami..
the hairs on our floor really can make a wig lo..
and the sand on the floor can plant a cactus.. T.T

and and and...
my kitchen suddenly gt mushroom man..
mushroom! gosh.... i x put fertilizer pun..
its just beside the basin..
i was thinking..
ok ok grow more! im gonna cook you
but after im back from college..
mati sudah!
easy come easy go.. hihik
the babies all mati also..
sangat kesian..
but can u imagine how cute izit?
whole bunch of mushroom squeeze at the corner of my kitchen wall..
hihik

okie thats all..
h1n1 is very serious nowadays..
my tutor everyday force us to eat vitamin c..
even sat and sun also need to eat..
hmm very good very good!
go away ahini!

take care oh my friends and family..
drink more water (i pandai cakap nia la..)
oh ya mami dadi i drink 1.5l of water everyday..
chun chun 1.5l..
hihik i will take good care of myself..dont worry! ^^

tha tha.. <<< who actually noe that tha tha is bahasa tamil?
hehehe

friends.. i pandai in bahasa tamil oh! next time cakap bahasa tamil with u ppl

mami dadi aying afui popo and my friends..
nan unei kadelikirain!

heeee

bye!