Saturday, March 26, 2011

My experience as a nurse

I am a 2nd year nursing student now and so far everything is smooth sailing for me.. 2 days ago when mama called me, she asked me whether i regret to take nursing or not..Though i answered her confidently that i dont feel regret at all but this question kept popping out my mind at night.. hrmmm.. am i really suitable to be a nurse?

Last week i was posted in general ward where we can find all kind of cases in that ward.. I was instructed to send 30+ years old and healthy looking female patient for scope, which is called as oesophagogastroduodenoscopy -.- (OGDS).. Its a very simple, fast and safe procedure but when i sent that young and pretty patient into the scope room, she hold my hand and told me that if anything happen to her, she asked me to take out her organ donation card from her purse and hand it to her family.. i was like huh? then i replied her: " miss, this is a very simple and fast procedure, you will be ok.. dont worry " But she still insisted me to give her family the card, then i smiled to her and say ok ok i will, dont worry..

The next morning when i was about to check patients' vital signs, she already woke up and was reading her bible on the bed.. that was early in the morning and it was still very dark.. i felt glad deep inside my heart.. :) what a holy christian.. hee ok thats not the point! :D After some time doctor came to see her and showed her lots of x-ray films while explaining to her one by one.. i wanted to hear what doctor said but i cant hear at all so i just left the room and do my own thing.. Few minutes later staff nurse asked me to take out her branula as she is ready to be discharged, so i went in her room and talked to her.. ( our conversation )

me : So miss, hows ur result? :)
pt : Erm, not that good.. all my organs already become swollen..
me : O.o huh why?? did doctor tell u why?
pt : yea.. he said its because of the accumulation of fluid in my organs..
me : Huh?? accumulation of fluid? why?? ( i know i sound kepo here but its a fast and spontaneous conversation okayy )
pt : Erm.. because doctor said its already 4th stage already..
me : ( My eyes went O.O ) 4th stage???
pt : yea.. doctor said i have cancer..stomach cancer and its in 4th stage already.. the cancerous cells already spread to the other organs, including my lungs, liver, lymph node.. there is no cure anymore..

I felt so sad, just like a knife stabbing into my heart.. a young and pretty lady in front of me has cancer??? and its in last stage already.. i remain calm and looked at her..
me : so how did u detect it?
pt : i dont know.. i felt painful on my neck and i thought its because i didnt sleep properly at night.. now only i know its because my lymph node already swollen due to cancer.. and i am admitted in hospital because i feel that something is not right with my stomach as i always feel pain.. i just want to check.. i never knew that i will receive news like this.. its just too sudden..
me : miss, its ok,k? u just pray and pray.. Leave everything to God.. we cant do anything now.. the only thing we can do is to pray only.. :)
pt : oh so u are a christian too?? yea i know.. I believe that God will heal me.. He is the Healer..

I smiled to her.. but i know my face was very very down that time.. i just cant smile properly.. i was the one who told her that everything will be ok.. its only scope.. yea of course nothing will happen during the scope, but whats more important is the result of the scope.. and i totally forgot about that.. sigh.. but she looked so calm and cheerful when she told me about it.. she said the only thing that she's worried the most is to tell her parents.. she' afraid that they cannot accept this truth.. yea right... :'(((

I always wanted to enter her room and talk to her but i just dont have the chance..Few hours later, i was instructed to change bedsheet for the other beds in her room and i was like YES!! :p but she was packing that time and looked so busy so i just continue with my own work..

Then she walked beside me and gave me a flower and a card! specially for me only.. i am so touched.. this is my 1st flower from patient since i entered nursing course.. of course i dont mind for not having any but when i see my friends brought flower back, i will feel that am i not doing that good enough as compared to my friends? but know what? i just knew that most of my friends asked for flowers from patient's hampers or their bouquet of flower.. THEY ASKED FOR FLOWERS! i knew it from my friend..what the.. -.- so, this flower is sooo precious and special for me as i feel so appreciated..

so my conclusion is, so far, i can confidently say i love nursing because a thank you from patient can really make your day.. You see your patient enters hospital with wheel chair or trolley, looking so ill and walks out of the hospital healthily.. thats the greatest gift for every staffs in hospital.. For me nursing is not about gaining experience and help staff nurses only.. we have to serve patient sincerely and take care of them from the core of our heart.. people always make fun of nurses by saying nurses clean shit and urine only, but i tell u.. one day when your parents are old and cannot control their bowel already, shit and urine all over their bodies and on the floor, do u have the patience to help them to clean up everyday? i do.

Saturday, March 5, 2011


If i am sarcastic enough,
If i am mean enough,
If i am bitchy enough,
If i am daring enough,
If i am stupid enough, (as in i do things without considering the consequences)
If i am not fear of God

I SWEAR, your bed, your wall, your pail, your wardrobe and your everything..
will be full of my insulting notes that can give you nightmare!


You only know how to paste stick note on wall and notice board and tell ppl what to do (in a very sarcastic way).. have you ever think of yourself? Did u ever bothered about the duty roster that i've made? You didnt even throw rubbish, in fact u always throw the unfinished food inside rubbish bin and wait for people to throw it.. if no one wants to throw, then u will just leave your unfinished food in rubbish bin and let it decompose by itself.. damn

If you are behaving like this, who are you to tell people what to do? You are not even house leader.. if u think im not good and strict enough, why dont u be house leader?? im just soo sick of being one zzz

Who will back you up when warden come and check? ME!
Who will help you to tell lies when warden asked me where are u? ME!
Who will help you to carry this carry that back to unit when you want to balik kampung? ME!

nahhh whatever la.. lazy to talk about it anymore -.-!